Foolish Heart

Well there goes my immature self again, pushing people away, I think there are moments like this for everyone, when they're so numb they don't even know what they should feel anymore, you want to understand others so well that you want to cry, but you also feel like you can't let your guard down, 'cause then something bad may happen.  I think I listen and listen to my mom complaining about how bad things go with my brothers and my father, and then is just like, I have all the responsability to no act like they do and I'm not going to,  I'm not a fool. But at the same time, I commit my faults, and then I regret what I did, what I thought, what I said, and everythings goes blank in my mind, so I try to escape from this part that ties  me to a heavy weight and reminds me how little I'm and how small is my strenght. "Forget" I said to myself, you can do better, you can succeed, don't surrender, you got a lot of heart. I just wish that someone would give me the strenght that I'm trying to give everyday, but I know I already have the light in me, but is so hard  to bring it out and let it spark.